(Difford/Tilbrook)
WARNING: These lyrics are unconfirmed and may be inaccurate. They represent the best attempt at deciphering the song we have yet to see.


You re like a spot on a neck
You re like a bounce in a cheque
You re like a rip in a parachute
You re like a scratch on a face
You re like a suicide case
Like a hippy playing the spoons - you re a jerk boy
You re like a skid in the pants
You re like an actor at Cannes
You re like a car with a broken hose
You re like a coffee that s cold
You re like a joke that s been told
You re like a model with a broken nose - you re a jerk boy
Rool Britannia
Britannia rules the waves

You re like a girl with pink eyes
You re like a loser that tries
You re like a dose from a day on the broads
You re like a one armed miner
You re like a mirror designer
You re like a day in the life of a lord - you re a jerk boy

Rool Britannia
Britannia rules the waves

You re like a spot on a neck
You re like a bounce in a cheque
You re like a skid in the pants
You re like an actor at Cannes
You re like a girl with pink eyes
You re like a loser that tries
You re like a scratch on a face
You re like a suicide case
You re like a coffee that s cold
Just like a joke that s been told
You re a jerk boy

Rool Britannia
Britannia rules the waves

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